Halton Ocean

I’m not just the best in the mornings. I try hard to put a brave face on but iit doesn’t really work: at heart, I am not really fit to speak untill a few cups of tea have hit the bottom of my gullet and the fog of sleep has lifted from my cranium.

I can diguise this to a degree: punters have questions, even first thing in the morning so over the years I hope the defense mechanism/coping strategy cuts in so that I do not offend anyone. I do not want to be rude: I just can’t be arsed to speak for the first half hour or so of the day.

I was up early today to pump cylinders. I had tiptoed around the deck so as not to wake them up. Caught in the act, one asked for a 32pc. Another just air tops. Fair dues, these things are important but I didn’t want to discuss them.

So when for the second morning in a row, JW sticks her head out the window and shouts ” TEA BOB!!” I know there is a rare star on the boat. She must know me troo well. Thats the only thing worth saying at that point. She’s the best.

the wind has died down and swung to the SE so less wobbly boat today.

The troops dived the KPW first, Lyness lunch then sat over the Dresden at the mo.

The humble blob is an often neglected and overlooked piece of kit but one that has, none the less, revolutionised diving practice. They are there (a) to stop you being lost, (b) to stop you being minced in a screw and (c) as a point of reference on ascent.

The simple orange self closing Buddy SMB is by far the best and no longer has room for improvement: it is as good as you get and can happily rest on it’s laurels knowing that it is now the pinicle of the evolutionary design process. People, however, still like to customise them and these personal addtions tell you a lot about the diver below.

It does not take a wide leap of imagination to guess who this blob belongs to..

This, on the other hand, is a classic case of mixed messaging and should be avoided..

Just checked with the harbours wind guage: 40kts gusting 52 from the west. Everything is charged with energy, the birds darting at full speed, the tops of the waves ripped off and shredded in to spray. The boat starts to dance and things come alive. There is an absolute pleasure in being part of the weather sometimes. What more can you ask for? Brilliant.

Missed the first dive on the KPW and headed over to the F2 instead. Caution is still the best part of valour sometimes too.

Afternoon update. Still windy so off to the V83. Yes, I know it’s not the best dive in the world but sometimes needs must and I would rather be here with everyone happily in the water than tied to the pier wishing I was out. So there.

They do say that the wind blows the cobwebs away. Maybe that’s why spiderman stayed at home today.

Now, normally I don’t mind a camera or two. I can handle folk taking a piccy or two. I am happy to be in people’s Kodak moment. But this week there is an undercurrent… those pictures are going onto the internet! Stealth, caution and cunning are required. A fck up would be fatal and speeding down the fast lane of the imformation super highway before the egg on the face was dry.

However, if it was me taking the picture..

It’s good to go home content in the knowledge that the troops are at peace with the world.

“You guys haven’t got an internet connection on the boat, have you?”

“You can’t read what I blog about you then….”

“eh? Not untill you get home?”

“Oh well…”

Troops dived the Brummer then the Doyle. The threat of wind has receeded and the vis remains good. They seem happy enough…

Troops all dived up so hit the ground running: Koln then tide on Tabarka.

They were chuffed with the vis and flat calm to boot.

Went out for a drink with the troops last night but they had buggered off to Kirkwall so managed to get v tipsy without them (it seemed rude not to having put party duds on and smelling of talc etc.)

This morning the new troops bundled into my hangover and onto the boat. I know a lot about them and what they have done from their blogs and other writings on the web but this is the first time I have met them in the flesh (not that they were naked, you understand)

Jane

Paralell(sic) lines

Obviously they were bursting with questions as to my secret tips and workings and how to get their amateur ramblings up to the professional standards observed here at Haltonocean so may run a workshop and “how to” later in the week. To be frank, from the cluttered and disorganised wibble that came from their minds the first conversation, I will have my work cut out.

….next time you see a line of elephants, trunks holding tails like Colonel Hathi leading the troops, make sure there is one at the front with an empty trunk and that the last tail is swinging free. Whats my point? Bloggers, blogging bloggers going round in circles: must avoid that scenario this week.

Run out of space on the server (again) so awaiting a kind person to allocate me more room so I can blog stuff for last week.

Yes, I know I am chancing my arm but only got a few more weeks to go so shouldn’t need that much more room….

Between the tides and the weather we only managed a drop on the Brummer today despite trying for the Clam Mac first thing.

Such is life!

Two Kestrels circled the boat on the trip from the Astronomer to Wick while we were still a long way out to sea: one caught a smaller brid on the wing and the roof of the wheelhouse looked like a pillow fight as feathers rained down for a while.

Their balance in the rigging looked positively amateur in comparison to the lazy ease demonstrated by seabirds. They got the hang of it in the end though.

Headed further north, 24nm NE of Fraserburgh to dive the Astronomer.

She was a 8400grt steamship sunk 2/6/40 by torpedo in 71m.

Carried on to Wick for the night.

We managed to snatch a dive out from under a poor forecast and for safety’s sake repeated the Remuera.

Dived the Remuera, a 11,445grt steamship sunk by a german plane attack on 26 August 1940.

She now lies 6 miles NE of Fraserburgh in 67m water.

early start from Wick to dive the Lynx, a 935grt destroyer sunk by mines on 9th Aug 1915. There are three distinct wreckage areas here and I managed to find the area around the bridge (fortuitous).

Troops enjoyed the dive though I suspect the vis is not quite as good as it should be, despite being a respectable 15m.

We were on station for both tides on the Clan Macinley off Wick but there was no slack either time so both dives were canned.

Not the best of starts.

Bundled troops out of van and onto boat, down to Longhope, fed them and then set off for Wick ready for a dive first thing sunday morning.

Tides massive so touched 15.4kts in the firth.

Helen Akacrew has found a cure for anthrax.

Apparently it does work on cold sores too.

Personally I think it would catch on better as a cream.

Dear Bob,

Thank you for an excellent weeks diving, it has been great fun. All of us have enjoyed it a lot. We all love the boat and hope that we can have another trip with you again some time soon.
We have all enjoyed the diving and my (charlotte) favourite dive was the one on the Tabarka, whilst John and Emma’s favourite dives of the holiday were the Brummer. John and I have had another first on this holiday - diving with the porpoises although I only saw 2 of them whilst John assured me that they were circling around us and at one point even swam through us! Anyway, it has been a pleasure meeting you and we have all enjoyed your company all week. I can now proudly say that I am a “proper” diver after eating raw scallops that we prepared on deck. Thanks again for having us and we hope to be diving off the Halton (Hilton) again soon. We have all had an ace time and will be sad to leave tomorrow.
Lots of love,
the dive family
xxx
ps woof woof from jake

Gentle finish: Koln then F2. Weather perfect.